Four Common Fears of Moms-To-Be

Photo credit: Tuva Mathilde Løland

Motherhood is a life-changing transition for a woman. Some women are more anxious than others, but in any case, fear is a normal feeling that needs to be accepted, investigated, processed, and integrated. In this article, I talk about four common fears of moms-to-be.

These are fears that I experienced myself, so if you’re experiencing these right now, please don’t feel ashamed or guilty. At the time, I didn’t pay attention to them. I rejected them and focused on the excitement. I hoped that they would disappear after seeing my child for the first time. That wasn’t the case.

I had postpartum depression and anxiety, and I don’t want you, mom-to-be, to go through that. Let me clarify: if you’re experiencing these fears, it doesn’t mean that you’ll have postpartum depression and anxiety, but it’s a possibility. If you need to get something out of your chest, I’m here for you.

Fears of moms-to-be: Will I be able to keep my child alive?

Babies are fragile creatures, and parents need to be extra careful when taking care of them especially in the first months. You have to hold their heads, make sure they have enough food, and always put them to sleep on their back to avoid sudden infant death. All of this is your responsibility, and it can be a lot to deal with.

Fears of moms-to-be: What if becoming a mom doesn’t come naturally to me?

Some women were born with maternal instincts, but others, like me, were not. When my husband and I decided to have a baby, I wasn’t sure that I would fall in love with my child right away. People always tell you that you do. Here is what I can tell you in all honesty: You will fall in love with your child right away, but anxiety may prevent you from feeling that love.

Fears of moms-to-be: What if I feel trapped?

Once you have a child, there’s no turning back. It’s not like changing your mind after buying a dress and sending it back. A child is forever. Even though you know that just the thought of feeling trapped, can create a lot of anxiety. The idea of escaping is an irrational thought. Just know that it’s your fear talking. What your fear is telling you is not real.

Fears of moms-to-be: What if I feel I’m losing myself?

Motherhood is like starting a new life. The one you had before is gone. And since people often identify with their work or the roles they play in society, it may feel that you’re losing your identity. Since your identity is a permanent essence inside of you, you’re not losing anything. You’re opening up to something bigger.

I want to tell you again that all these fears are normal, but this doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t do anything about them. If you ignore these fears, they may get bigger and ruin precious moments with your little one. Each one of these fears can be transformed into love and excitement.

I’d be honored to guide you in this transformational process.